August 1st, 2007

Keep Walking

What's missing?

I've been feeling pretty depressed for the past few weeks -- which some of my regular blog-readers might have noticed in the sharp drop-off in original material posted here. I have an "empty feeling" like something important in my life is missing. After some serious reflection and soul-searching, I think I know exactly what it is: Companionship of friends.

Allow me to clarify: I know I do have a lot of friends, but it seems that over the past ten years I noticed a serious drop-off in communication and social time with close friends that were on an "even keel" with my lifestyle.

What do I mean by an even keel? Well, it seems the people I hang out with nowadays simply don't have the same resources nor desire to travel and explore like I do. I'm talking about popping off for a weekend to New York, Club Run or mini-vacation. Basically, those that have the free time to travel don't have the cash to travel and those that have do have the cash don't have the time. Add into this mix that virtually everyone I meet online seems interested only in sex (not that that's an entirely bad thing, it's just kind of demeaning when it's the only thing.)

I love to travel, I love to explore and I love new experiences. From the e-mail I get, it's obvious that many people love reading about my travels and experiences, but from what I read between the lines, it seems many people are only living vicariously through my travels behind a computer monitor. It's sort of cool to live in the limelight of all the travel I do and all the things I experience, but it's become very lonely.

I am a very social creature. Now that I've been working from home for almost a year, I find myself becoming a "home body" (when not travelling), having no workmates to go to lunch with, socialize with, go to concerts or even to go to Fenway to catch a game! Don't get me wrong, working from home is awesome (if you have the discipline to do so) -- it's just another brick in the wall of loneliness.

Shortly after moving to Boston, I formed the Boston Bears. I missed the camaraderie and brotherhood I used to get from The Rochester Rams and had hoped that the Boston Bears would develop into an extended circle of friends -- sadly, this has not been the case. Yes, we've held barnights, happy hours, movie nights, even a (poorly attended) group trip to New York City -- but it seems that no one wants to life a finger to plan nor work on events -- many don't even choose to attend. Those that do attend Boston Bears functions tend to stick with local events only and prefer not to travel. I struggled to get four Boston Bears members to attend the Long Island Raven's run, where the four of us hosted a grand cocktail party. I haven't given up on the Boston Bears, but there are days...

Motor biking is another passion of mine. I started the Boston Gay Bikers (after enquiries to the Boston Riders went unreplied) -- after a year of trying to plan bike trips, to which no one but myself showed up to (everyone else who was interested wanted to be a "rider" not a "driver"), I threw in the towel on that idea.

I was involved with a support group in Boston for two years, to which we actually managed to have several planning meetings -- but when it was time to put things into effect, there were roadblocks and hassles all the way... I left that group in a fit of rage, as it was becoming obvious to me that no one wants to "do" anything -- well, except for drink and have sex. (Again, don't misunderstand me! When I travel, my evenings are full of bar-hopping and trysts! It's simply not normally the primary focus of my travels, it's just a side benefit!)

Well, as if I haven't learned my lesson yet, I'm once again trying to get a group off the ground -- this one is specifically for gay travel. The group is called MileageRunner. It's specifically designed to combine Mileage Running with gay travel (holidays, weekends, etc.) I have high hopes that the purpose of this new group will be clear enough to people that it's not about SEX. It's about gay men travelling together, exploring, experiencing other cultures and having new experiences.

Already on the books is: A trip to Portland, Oregon; a trip to Sint Maarten, and other things are in the works!

I sincerely hope that this group makes a good go of it, otherwise, I'm simply going to go offline, hang up my leathers and seek out other groups that meet in person. Maybe the "Greater Boston Business Council" would be a good start? I hear that a lot of well-to-do jet-setters are members.