A Pot-Stirring Pilot and Crying Babies
Was just checking out the informative “Ask the Pilot” column on Salon.com, and found an amusing nugget.
Pilot/author Patrick Smith, with tongue-in-cheek, was writing about airline marketing ideas, and proposed this one:
“Here’s a challenge to any airline daring enough: a rule that requires the medicating, muzzling or sequestering of all children under 4 years old — below deck would be nice, or out on the wing.”
No doubt he was simply stirring things up, to get a lively reaction (and to judge by the comments, that’s exactly what he’s getting!) — but what do YOU think?
DO we need a “kids-only” section on airplanes?
Of course, I decided to be a bit crass with my reply to this question, as well as a quick ribbing to John who said in his reply: "There’s nothing more annoying than short people who lean their chairs back into someone like me (6′1″ with long legs)." I can't wait to see who replys to my venomous reply:
When I was young and going to church with my family, there was a separate sound-proof room in the back of our church called the “cry booth”. It had about 8 rows of pew seating, a glass window and a speaker system so they could see and hear the minister/priest, but at the same time the patrons couldn’t hear their screaming offspring!!
Perhaps something like this should be considered? Crying baby? To the back of the plane with you and the demon seed!
From the loud, non-stop screaming I hear on flights at times, I swear they’re circumcising the poor things in flight with the dull plastic knife from what the airline calls ‘dinner’.
In this day and age, why haven’t they created a lolly with a mild neural toxin that can temporarily paralyse the vocal cords in children?
I would pay extra for an “adults only” flight, no one under 21 allowed. (Yes, teenagers can be just as bad, if not worse than crying children when they’re excited about flying to ’spring break’ with their mates!)
As to our 6′1″ friend, John, who’s complaining about ’short people’ reclining in their seats: the seats go back for a reason — comfort. I’m sure you recline yours as well. Everyone gets the same amount of potential personal space irrespective of height. Short or tall, reclining your seat allows you to relax and (sometimes) sleep. If you don’t want to deal with a ’short person’ reclining all of FIVE DEGREES, pay for an upgrade to an exit row or front row of the class you’re flying in. If you’re flying United, go to “Economy Plus” — US Airways just introduced similar ‘enhanced leg room’ seating also. Sorry you were born so tall, it can be a handicap, can’t it.
What REALLY BUGS me are obscenely obese persons in the centre seat with their blubber flowing over both arm-rests onto my arms or legs. There’s a standard 150% fare for a person that needs two seats — why don’t airlines cash in on this? Personal space is already at a minimum when flying. I don’t need someone’s “love handles” cramming me into the window to escape! The rule should be: If you need a ’seatbelt extender’ to get your seatbelt to close, you must purchase two seats. And only diet Coke! No pretzels or peanuts for you!!
Don’t even get me started with the wheelchair people… (just joking!!)
Now sit back and watch the sparks fly... ;-)
You too can put your two cents into the discussion. The website is here. Enjoy!